I've had another bout of no-blogging-itis. I had a lot on my mind and was swirling about and ultimately went back and forth and just didn't prioritize blogging.
But I think I'm back again. Well, hopefully anyway.
I've alluded to something that's been going on in my life in quite a few posts in the past few months. I've circled around it. I've implied it. But I've never actually admitted it. I think I'm ready.
I'm getting divorced.
Yes, it's happening. It was my decision. My choice. But that hasn't made it any easier to deal with.
I feel like a huge failure. I feel awful for hurting loved ones. I feel horrible that my daughter and my marriage is now just another statistic. Honestly, in the short term - it completely sucks.
But I had to think of the long term. I wasn't happy. I wasn't reaching my potential. I take the blame. I take the fault.
Long term I want to be happy. And it's important to me that my daughter sees me as a strong female role model who shows her how to be happy and achieve her dreams. That's what is important to me right now.
So please be patient with me while I try to pick up the pieces of my life. I'm trying to do the best I can with what I have. I'll try to blog about it when I can. But we will see.
So, now that proverbially the elephant in the room has been talked about, perhaps I will feel like I can move on and talk more about what's going on with me and how I'm continuing to try to be a fitter mommy.
Here's wishing everyone a wonderful 2013! Farewell to 2012!
~A
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